Where the road leads next

I just upgraded my iMac to 10.5, and was browsing my Windows network at the office and I noticed these cute little Windows PC Server icons.
Being a savvy network administrator, I thought I noticed something "familiar" with the image on the screen. So I opened the network in "cover flow" and had to laugh.




The screen on the Windows PC's are all blue screens of death!

HA HA HA HA HA!

See, this is what I love about Apple - not only do they create incredible hardware and software, they have creative people that take the time to add that little extra to make something great.

I.Love.This.Guy

humor, that is.


ER Part 1


ER Part 2


Doctor


Walkie Talkie

It is that time of year again.

Time to gather with friends and family at local concerts, with local talent, and remember why you serve wine at the after party.

These things just beg to be eaten. Anything that ugly, that stupid, and with that much tasty meat can only have been designed for one purpose.

Digestion.

It looks like the head on these hideous creatures has already been partially chewed just to bring home the point.

They are so completely divorced from intelligence, eating them actually sets up lethargy in the carnivore. A few grams of tryptothane can render most males helpless after dinner. Imagine the effect this chemical must have on the bird. No wonder turkeys walk around mouths gaping open.

I have noticed that females seem immune to tryptothane. Dishes get done, food put away, pie served, and kids herded outside all by the end of the first quarter of the Detroit game. It is amazing, and further study is in order.

Tis the season for turkey. Time to get all sugared up and wait in line to buy stuff I don't really need, but at that price suddenly find one. Time to shake of restraint and gear up for parties and hot cocoa and dipped salty stuff. Time to bring out the fat clothes and pack on a few pounds just in case global warming is all wrong and we have 9 months of winter.

After all there are only 29 more shopping days left until Christmas. So much turkey - so little time.

I love blogging.

For the simple fact that doing it provides me with an exceptional excuse to avoid what I should be doing.

And for that I will forever be a fan of Blogger and Wordpress. Those two little words that didn't even exist a few years ago, have become my Xanax and Valium. I love thee, both of thee.

Note to self: Use "thee" more often. It makes you sound educated and haughty all at the same time and impresses thee. Impresses thee greatly.

It is no secret to those who have shared time with me that I am adept at talking. In fact, I can talk real good. Goodly talk I can. Chatting with me is like a deep cool never ending spring of verbal goodness satisfying thee on a hot summers day. I like to hear myself talk, an important character default for those aspiring to be like thee.

Come to think of it, saying "thee" is just this side of schizophrenic.

Where was I? Oh yes, procrastination. "A powerful action where the act of doing it can sometimes cause you to exert more effort than the actual deed." That is the Davie definition. That was a freebie. Now THAT is an interesting word. Just look at it; "freebie" it makes me smile just saying it.

You see, if I can spend time on this blog all those nasty little things called work will simply be unable to be accomplished. I know this isn't earth shattering - give me a break I am wasting time.

Hey, is it actually possible to shatter the earth? I don't think that thought has ever crossed my mind as a real possibility, like "look out - don't hit the ground too hard - you might break it!" Of all the things that could happen to the planet, I can honestly say exploding into a pile of broken glass is nowhere on my radar. Did people actually think the earth was made of glass? Where did that phrase come from? A marble salesman most likely.

Now that is the job for me. "Marble salesman". I got your cat eyes, your pureies, oh yea, and your shooters and look at this; steelies! I could do it. I could sell marbles. It is easy to get people to buy stuff in the asylum. For one thing, they ain't going anywhere and everyone knows that marbles are THE thing this year for Christmas.

Well.... my diet Dr. Pepper is almost gone and my creativity should really be used on stuff that will help pay my mortgage. I just found out that our health care costs are going up - Yea! I love learning to trust God with my finances by making sure there is no possible may I am the one who can provide.

Did I say love? What I really meant to say was it is time to start something else to stop thinking about that.

I love flying.

I used to have dreams as a child that I could jump and just keep floating all the way to the top of the house of my youth. The dreams were so real and vivid, I would have to convince myself that jumping out the second floor window would end in a heap. Nonetheless, the feeling of flight has always captivated me.

The closest I was able to get to reality flying as a kid was my nearly daily ritual of jumping off our garage. I can feel and hear every one of those mini test flights getting in and out of chairs today through the creaking and cracking of my knees. Thankfully, they don't hurt, but they sure sound like they should. I think I crushed my nerves sometime back in the 80's.

6 AM Sunday morning I was once again on an airplane, the socially acceptable way to fly, and despite the fiasco that air travel has become in America, I was giddy as a school...boy.

My trip to Chicago also included ridding a train, which was actually kind of a letdown due to construction. At one point during the ride I am sure I witnessed hobo's jumping off and walking. In fact, without warning we reached the "end of the line" and boarded a double length bus for the remainder of the trip.

The bus ride was much more intense, and watching 60 year old bodies flying down the walkways was both hilarious and terrifying. As if it wasn't enough to make it off the bus, I am certain the bus driver intentionally tried to run the people over that made it.

The day concluded with 2 miles of walking the streets of Chicago to the hotel. A long day at McCormick Place for Graph Expo a $45 steak, a few more miles of walking, and a 38 story restless night sleep.

Do you know that spiders build webs 38 stories up on hotel windows? That's what I thought, but apparently the bugs that fly up that high are really really yummy.

Monday morning greeted me with a walk to the lake, which apparently no one in Chicago wants to actually touch, since it is nearly impossible to physically reach it. This place was neat, and a long way to and from the Hyatt Hotel.

More bus rides, a cab ride with a Muslim driver, another cab ride to the correct place with a freshly awakened African, lunch with a friend, and another cab ride with an Indian determined to never stop back to McCormick. $30 dollars was never spent faster, nor had $30 ever ran as many stop signs, or nearly ran over as many pedestrians. Forget Disney Land - ride Chicago. More walking and chatting with lifelong printer friends at the show and a final bus ride back to the hotel. A quick soda at the hotel bar, a solicitation from a Vietnam Veteran reeking of alcohol asking for money for chemotherapy, and finally a last cab driven by a very large very colorful brother from Chicago.

Incidentally, you can't make a ho' into a church woman. 7 inches is pretty big, it is best to keep on gambling when you win, you can't trust women (even the ones you father) and merge lanes are best used at the very last moment right up to the crash barrels. Apparently I look like a 54 year old, and even though I actually fit in the front seat, still a "big guy". I fear I have made a friend for life. I am just really thankful he didn't eat me.

A little striptease at O'Hare for security, 20 minutes of waiting on the tarmac, and finally another fine trip above the clouds and into the arms of my family.

I love flying, but I love landing even more.