Where the road leads next

You know that feeling you get from time to time like you have been here before? Its like the soundtrack of life s l o w s d o w n for just a second revealing that life itself is out of sync?

No?

Me either.

I wish!

It used to happen so much when I was a kid I could actually predict what was next and consciously see myself arriving at the moment when it all synced back up again in third person.

Or would that be 4th person? The real me, the Deja Vu persons meeting the real me, and the observer me aware of all 3.

Heh, can you tell I took NightQuil.

Okay, it is 4:30 in the afternoon - that excuse will not fly.

To be fair, I hardly ever have Deja Vu anymore since I learned the trick to do something so off the wall, like screaming "I love Peter Brady" while flapping like a chicken, that it breaks the magical moment.

I.don't.love.Peter.Brady. Marcia? Perhaps.

Where was I.

Oh yes, this whole Deja Vu thing has started again for me, but this time I am actually repeating history. It started a couple weeks ago when I realized I was doing the same Al-Anon step at the meeting I was chairing with the exact same results at the end of the meeting. I could have recorded the first meeting and played it back and I swear to God it would have been the same. It kind of freaked me out a bit. Either I really like the step, or I have been in a rut for the last 4 months.

This Deja Vu happened again Sunday morning as I was singing at church. Granted, I have sung at church for years, but the feeling of things slowly pulling apart was unmistakable. I could have closed my eyes and walked through the rest of the event and never missed a beat.

So I sit here typing on a new Macintosh in the same old office on a new - old blog. And as I go through my days of routine I can't help but feel I have been here before. Right here - exactly in this moment before.

It is unnerving and I don't like the implications of it.

A: I am out of my mind.
B: I am just a "little off" and less NightQuil is a really good idea.
C: Bingo! - life is just a Merri-Go-Round, you change horses but it is still the same ride.
D: You are stuck my boy.
E: See what happens when you take T.V. away? There is a reason people watch it.
F: You really do love Peter Brady and this... (I can't even go there)
G: You made all this up to amuse yourself as you wait to go home.

I think it is a combination of B C and D. Whatever the truth is, I am ready for the picture to change.

It wasn't all that interesting the first time around.