Where the road leads next

I have determined that 2007 was an upside down year.

I had no idea our stop in Wisconsin October of 2006 on the way to visit relatives was a premonition for the year to come, but there can be no doubt that 2007 for me was the beginning of undoing.

Time has a funny way of pilling up changes to the point where you must deal with them. I am sure there is a divine directive in this but since measuring God is nearly impossible, time will have to do.

Time was pilling it on in 2007.

I don't even remember 2007 being all that spectacular. It was filled with the usual doldrum of work that will horrifically be 10 years in January. It is almost inconceivable that I have spent 10 years of my life in the same office. 10 years driving to the same location. Apparently I needed that much time to get whatever I was supposed to get out of that job. I am all but certain I will not be there much past 2008. I still have no idea what is next, but I can feel that change is on the horizon.

Change has taken on a new meaning for me in 2007. The year proved that even though times get tough, economies turn for the worse, wars linger, and dreams die, change is just around the corner. Walk the path of patience long enough and a fork will be found, or better said the fork will find you. Hold onto indecision long enough and it will turn into a decision. Learning to trust that waiting can be the best action is a lesson garnered only by experience.

Trust can only be experienced by finding yourself in a place where you must. I still don't like it, but what I think is becoming less important to what I know. I know better in 2007.

The best thing learned this last year was that "I don't know" is an answer. It is as complete an answer as "I do know" and always preferable to "I think I know". "I don't know" was the start of so many wonderful things like "I don't want" and the second best thing I learned, "no". "No" and I have become best friends, much to the chagrin of those that never heard it uttered by me. "Yes" has been added lately, but it is always slung and counterbalanced with no. No can be cut loose at any time and always trumps yes. Yes is just the trail blazer for no.

There can be no doubt to those who have watched me this year that 2007 was a banner year for me marked by the simple fact that nothing spectacular happened. There was no crisis. There was no "have to". The most noteworthy thing was that there was no noteworthy thing. Even blogging took on a different flavor as concern for real change trumped the internal drive for change simply for the sake of change.

Mind you, this year has not been without its drama. In fact, more had transpired this year in the way of real crisis than I can remember in long time. The difference is that this time around there is simply nothing I can do about it. It is all external, and as such, is completely out of my control. Sure I still worry about it, but I find myself able to (for the most part) put things into perspective and realize that if things are to change, God is the one who has to do it. It is all on Him, so either way it will turn out good.

I realized that truth about a month ago and it has made all the difference. I am not 100% there yet, but most days I look with anticipation to what may come. Dread has been replaced with hope and even though I have a vivid imagination about all that could be, I choose to dwell on what is.

2007 was an upside down year. 2008 will be all right.

I am a Ron Paul fan but this article got me thinking.

I know there are dissenting views on how things should be run in America, but the bottom line for me is that I can not stand the idea of the Clinton's running the country for another 4 years.

Do you realize that two families have been in power for over twenty years! Two - the Bush's and the Clinton's.

Think about it.

If Hillary gets the nod and convinces the "give me class" to use the power of government to steal your wealth and give it to them, we are setting ourselves up for 24 or 28 years of rule from just two families, two ideals, two ways of thinking, two lines of power.

Make no mistake, Hillary has one thing in mind - socialism. She is no more concerned about traditional American values of liberty, family, and faith than she is in defending the constitution. The constitution is simply a roadblock, a "living document", a framework, something to be manipulated to take power away from the people.

Make no mistake, the GOP has one thing in mind - fascism. Both parties are on the same track, just different trains. Do NOT be fooled again by fear and the flag and the cross and vote your freedom away. The education bill, NAFTA, CAFTA, no child left behind, the horrific Patriot Act, which effectively gives dictatorship authority to the president and suspends all your civil liberties and rights if deemed a "terrorist" all happened on the GOP watch.


Think NAFTA is no big deal?

Sinclair Lewis said: "When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross."

28 years is a long time people.

We are not subjects - we are free people. We are not to be ruled over, we are to be governed by men and women we elect to represent US! The power behind the office of President is granted by the people. It is not a right for a privileged few, it is the office of the people, for the people, by the people.

Don't you think it is time for someone else to have a go at it?

What are the odds that I would read about my beloved alma mater on Apple's website? I used to work in that "Super Computer Lab" they talk about in the article. I was working there when we got the new Apple Quadra 700's with 8MB or RAM! I have more RAM on my cell phone.

I like to think I was instrumental in pushing the envelope at the lab, and just maybe some of my curiosity rubbed off. I was the first to export DXF files from Autocad to Strata much to the amazement of my professors and disgust of my classmates.


I still remember creating that bike, saving it to a floppy disk, walking it over to the Macintosh and importing it. It Worked!

I miss the excitement of discovery. Most days the most excitement I get around here is not hitting traffic on the way home.

Of course all that was eons ago, over 15 years! In any case, it is good to see that BSU is still leading the way in creative thinking.

I just upgraded my iMac to 10.5, and was browsing my Windows network at the office and I noticed these cute little Windows PC Server icons.
Being a savvy network administrator, I thought I noticed something "familiar" with the image on the screen. So I opened the network in "cover flow" and had to laugh.




The screen on the Windows PC's are all blue screens of death!

HA HA HA HA HA!

See, this is what I love about Apple - not only do they create incredible hardware and software, they have creative people that take the time to add that little extra to make something great.

I have determined that learning to trust is one of those lessons that must be experienced in order to master. Trust is an action - like swimming - you can't really learn how to swim by reading about it, or talking about it, or thinking about it.

The only way we learn how to swim is to get wet.

It is this realization, and ONLY this realization, that has allowed me to walk down this road of learning to trust. Walk is too strong a word, it is more like crawl, or perhaps a slow shuffle. In any case I am determined to do what ever it takes to make forward progress. At times it feels like the only thing moving me on is my stubborn determination to prove that if trust is an experience, come hell or high water, I WILL experience it.

Sink or swim - I am getting wet.

The anonymous card the usher handed me at church on our way out yesterday was a startling splash in the face. I certainly wasn't expecting the $250.00 gift card. I never even fought the temptation an hour earlier to keep my tithe check or balked at giving the $25.00 for the staff, even though the act guaranteed my kids would have one less gift this year. And my reward for dipping a toe into the deep waters of faith was I didn't drown!

I know it is almost impossible to drown getting a toe wet, but I assure you that small act from my vantage point was not unlike tipping over the edge of Niagara Falls.

This week looks like it may be a "knee deep" week. The funny thing is the water doesn't seem all that bad now that I have been in it a while. There are no crashing waves, no slippery rocks. No one is pushing me off the dock or throwing me off the boat. This learning to swim is nothing if not....

Peaceful.

I was looking through my photo library today and found these 2 pictures my son took.

It got me thinking about pictures, how powerful they are, and why I seem to forget that I love photography.

There really is no good excuse why I haven't taken more pictures. I have a decent digital SLR, a great Macintosh computer, I am an expert in PhotoShop, and have all the time I need to play. The only thing I can point to is that I have simply lost interest in a subject.

My son loves his cats so when he gets in the mood to click the cats are his muse.

I got no muse.

My New Year's resolution is to make time for pictures.

My New Year's resolution is to find my muse.